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Family and Friends

October 18th, 2013

Why aren’t you open about your HIV+ status?

MichaelPride2013SignSMALL

I believe a lot more people could be open about their HIV status, and their only reason for not doing so is fear.

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September 29th, 2013

Two Minutes of Advice on Testing HIV Positive

MarkTimeMachineGrab

I had to create a video in my own peculiar way — something that demonstrates the sense of humor that has served me well over the course of 30 years living with HIV.

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September 24th, 2013

The Most Important Gay Porn Film Ever Made?

DawsonD20bEDIT

The film is either a transgressive act of eroticism, or an act that demonstrates how to become infected with HIV. Or perhaps both.

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September 3rd, 2013

The Real Poz Guys of Atlanta III

Real Poz Guys PIC 2013

These guys must be getting the hang of this, because we discussed and revealed things like never before. From crystal meth addiction to our mothers, nothing was off limits.

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July 26th, 2013

Suicide: A Love Story

DickEmilKilaRESIZED

I knew about assisted suicide but had never heard of the mechanics of it firsthand… or had witnessed the haunted result like the one that now sat chain smoking across my living room.

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July 10th, 2013

An AIDS Death in the Family

DickEmilKilaRESIZED

We heard wheels, barely squeaking across tile floors, rolling out of the master bedroom toward the front door. A heavy door opened and then closed. I wanted to pull the shades wide open and see for myself, and I didn’t dare.

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May 8th, 2013

What It Feels Like for a Mom

Mother - Copy

“A boy’s best friend is his mother.” — Norman Bates, Psycho I was standing at the ticket counter of the movie theater and couldn’t believe my ears. They were telling me that “Theater of Blood,” […]

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April 3rd, 2013

Revisiting My Sad and Trivial Night with Rock Hudson

Rock Glamor

In a final act of staking my claim, I asked the damp, drunk and spent star to scribble “All my best, Rock Hudson” on a piece of notebook paper before his hasty exit down the duplex stairs and out to the dingy street below.

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December 17th, 2012

Hurting Mom on My First Gay Christmas

christmas tree polartoid

There is so much distance in my mother’s eyes that I fear she may never come close to me again. Circling her stare are wrinkles of pain, betrayal even, and in her hand she holds the watch.

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November 15th, 2012

On Board the 2012 HIV Cruise Retreat

RayDavidSMALL

The protective walls that often surround those of us living with HIV came crumbling down, replaced with new relationships, email addresses and phone numbers. By the time we docked back in Ft Lauderdale, hugs were long and new confidants had been established.

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