Detail and broad image of Christopher Yoculan’s piece, Identity.

When Fort Lauderdale resident Benjamin P. Lap attended a fundraising event in 2003, the startling installation, Identity, by multimedia artist and activist Christopher Yoculan, struck him immediately.

“It was such a powerful piece that was creative in its use of materials,” Benjamin told me recently. “To see an artist depict himself through the literal use of his various HIV medications was just so powerful. The name of it, Identity, perfectly captured it.” 

Benjamin bid on the artwork and it was soon occupying a prominent space in his Fort Lauderdale home. 

Benjamin P. Lap in his home with “Identity,” in 2005.

The piece is powerful indeed. Standing nearly five feet wide and taller still, the installation is constructed from pills arranged in individual plastic cylinders. Up close, it is a vast, colorful collection of medications but, when you stand back, the real image appears – a self portrait of artist Christopher Yoculan, with his extended tongue holding a single tablet. 

Identity hung in Benjamin’s home for more than twenty years. It produced awe and much conversation from everyone who saw it. It would have the same effect wherever it may be seen. More on that in a moment. 

Christopher Yoculan in a press article about his work.

Christopher, who also works as a mental health advocate in Fort Lauderdale, explains his thoughts on Identity in his artist statement this way:

When I first created Identity, the portrait was sharp, recognizable, and immediate. Constructed from hundreds of pills arranged into my own face, it confronted the viewer with an uncomfortable question: How much of our identity is shaped by what we consume, and how much by society’s judgment of it?

 

I created this piece as the final work in a trilogy following my HIV diagnosis. It was deeply personal, but it was never just about HIV. It was about every person whose life is defined—or judged—by the medications they take. Whether prescribed legally to survive or misused in an attempt to cope, pills have become symbols that society often weaponizes. We praise some medications while condemning others, forgetting that behind every prescription bottle is a human being simply trying to make it through another day.

And now, Identity must find a new home. “I’ve enjoyed it for nearly 25 years, but have downsized my living space,” Benjamin told me. “I think it’s time for someone else to enjoy this piece, or for it to find its way to a venue that will allow it to be seen more publicly. I think it would be ideal for an HIV clinic or the lobby or a national LGBTQ organization.”

Imagine just how striking Identity would be for anyone dealing with HIV or any chronic illness. The question is, who will be the next guardian of a truly unique work of art that holds HIV history within its frame?

“Identity” with an admirer.

“I sincerely hope Identity finds a home where it can continue to spark conversation and reflection,” Christopher told me. 

If you or your organization is interested in Identity, contact me directly. Benjamin stressed that the hand-off to a new custodian isn’t about money, but about visibility.

Mark