I'm as vain as the next guy. And if the next guy happens to be modest, or straight, or comfortable in his own skin, then it's really no contest. I'm way more vain. Describing my vanity requires making up new words. Vainer. The vainiest. Psychovain. That must be the...
My Muscles, My Disease: Portrait of a Gay Drug Addict
(This essay appears in my collection of essays, My Fabulous Disease: Chronicles of a Gay Survivor, available now at online outlets or your local bookstore.) There is a folder, tucked within a folder, buried deep in my computer files. I shouldn't be looking at its...
Fitness stud Nelson Vergel raids my fridge.
Nelson Vergel is not impressed with my refridgerator. Sure, it has double doors and a freezer drawer, but he's criticizing almost every damn thing inside it. Most of the items say "low fat" or "sugar free," but he claims it's all a terrible lie. Letting the HIV...
Carlton’s glorious, dangerous denial.
My friend Carlton is a chain smoker, even if all his cigarettes are imaginary. His standard pose consists of one hand resting on his hip -- elbow jutting out as if in the midst of a runway strut -- while the other arm is forever in motion, his hand swiveling...
(Not exactly) Like a Prayer
Soon, as many families take a seat at their Thanksgiving table, after the food is set but just before the feasting begins, a paralyzing moment will occur. What now? They'll wonder, glancing left and right. Should we pray? Uncomfortable seconds will tick by. Finally,...
My mega-blog week with The Bilerico Project
This week I am honored to be a "guest host" for The Bilerico Project, the leading online blogging salon for GLBT commentary, politics and culture. My job is to contribute three times a day and get out of my HIV rut! I'm having fun with pop culture topics you don't...
My t-cells could use a facelift.
Can I still complain about getting older if I was supposed to be dead twenty years ago? That's the dilemma of aging HIV positive guys like me. Feeling victorious over AIDS only takes your self esteem so far; there's no HIV medication to fight wrinkles. Oh wait, there...
The Price is Right, 30 years after coming on down
Within a few years of Coming On Down, there would be enormous differences between that video boy and myself, shaped by life events that would throw a wet blanket on my aw shucks optimism. I’ve tried to recover from them, to regain the hopeful, expectant glimmer found in the eyes of the kid from “The Price is Right,” with mixed success.
Does the Gay Men’s Health Summit make me look fat?
I took more time than usual choosing an outfit this morning, because of two terribly conflicting forces. First, I was on my way to the first day of the National Gay Men's Health Summit and, diametrically opposed to this fact, I went shopping for pants yesterday and...
My 2010 Gay Pride PSA (that will never air!).
What would I talk about if I had my very own public service announcement? I'd probably waste the whole thing telling some embarrassing story about growing up gay. Or how much I hate being a queer man pushing 50. What if, though, I really allowed myself to cut the crap...
